| TRINITY COLLEGE TREE | LEO VARADKAR |
|---|---|
| Wooden | Wooden |
| Deep roots in Trinity College | Shallow roots in Fine Gael |
| Planted 170 years ago | Plants self-serving stories in the media |
| Toppled by disease | Toppled Enda Kenny |
| Covered in bark | Barks at Independent Alliance |
| Lots of leaves during the summer | Lots of leave during summer recess |
| Exudes sap | Exudes smarminess |
| Would make great cabinet | Will never make great cabinet |
