No 9: SHANE ROUTS THE FAIKERS – from the Book of Geriatrics
And at the time there were amongst the people a group known as the FAIkers who wielded great and who were led by a man called John. The FAIkers were long of tooth and rich of meal vouchers and great was the gnashing of teeth amongst all when their name was mentioned.
And when Holy Shane of Ross didst hear of the FAIkers and how they didst present themselves as God Almighty; great was his willingness to smite them for he believed he alone was the Saviour of all.
And going to them he didst point the finger and seeing their many cobwebs, he did sayeth, ‘Out! Be gone! Scram! Off before I bring in even more new legislation under Section 3, Paragraph B, subsection (iv) of the Failure to Move On Act 2001 BC!!” And turning to the leader John the Fattest Wallet, he didst stare hard and wag his finger. And great was John’s fear, for he knew the game was up. And a great sigh of hope was heard from the people throughout the land.