The world of parliamentary farce was rocked with laughter yesterday when the EU unilaterally announced that it was dropping the backstop. “Yes,” said EU spokesperson Johann Bach-Stoppe. “We are replacing the word backstop with the word frontfoot. Other than that, nothing else will change”.
Welcoming this bold new initiative, UK PM Theresa May said that parliament will vote twice on a motion to accept it and she expects two entirely different results within minutes of each other – after which she intends to fly immediately to Brussels hoping to meet anybody who will agree to speak to her.