Craic & Codology



1. Using contemporary evidence, calculate to the nearest 5,000 how many trolleys will be required for Irish hospitals in winter 2030 if Simon Harris remains Minister for Health.
2. How many miles high would Johnny Ronan have to build an Eoghan Murphy-inspired shared living space to accommodate half the homeless people in Ireland by 2025?
3. If sound waves travel 5,000 miles in 10 seconds, how many minutes will it take for a Martian to switch over from The Ray D’Arcy Show?

1. Compare and contrast the prevailing temperatures between the south polar ice cap and a meeting between Leo Varadkar and Alan Shatter.
2. List 100 places the Chinese government would rather you asked questions about than Tiananmen Square.
3. Can you name one area of her life that Vogue Williams hasn’t felt compelled to tell us about?

1. In the Gospel according to Danny Healy-Rae, how many glasses of wine made from water did Jesus allow his followers to consume before travelling home by donkey? Was it a) five; b) 25 or c) Chrisht, I’m pished but I know the road, *hic*.
2. Discuss three ways in which insurance companies are making life hell for everyone.
3. Outline three reasons why the Labour Party hasn’t got a prayer under Brendan Howlin.

Schwadron - Real life