December 11, 2025 Craic & Codology

Following RTÉ’s announcement of its Eurovision boycott due to Israel’s participation, there has been growing scepticism over the effectiveness of the move. “We haven’t competed in the Eurovision for years,” said one frustrated Eurovision fan in Dublin. “As if anyone will miss us coming dead last in a semi-final.” Others, meanwhile, branded Ireland’s last entry,… Read more »

December 11, 2025 Craic & Codology

♦ The recesses of Jim’s mind to be thoroughly explored for any further forgotten items ♦ Free pain killers for all Fianna Fáil members to ease the ongoing suffering ♦ People keep coming up to me in pubs and smirking about it ♦ It still wasn’t as bad as anything Bertie did! ♦ Jim must… Read more »

December 11, 2025 Craic & Codology

Drew Harris The Christmas period can be a very expensive time of year and the cost-of-living crisis that we’re experiencing will only exacerbate these problems. With that in mind, I’d recommend getting someone else to pay your rent and maybe renovate the property while they’re at it. Kevin Bakhurst Father Christmas arrived a little early… Read more »

December 11, 2025 Craic & Codology

With Avatar: Fire And Ash currently hitting cinemas, it has been rumoured that the next sequel may include the National Children’s Hospital. The Avatar series is set in the mid-22nd century, when it is hoped the hospital might finally be completed, having recently missed its 16th deadline. “The Irish government in general is fertile ground… Read more »

December 11, 2025 Craic & Codology

by Penny Pincher RYANAIR HAS unexpectedly axed its Prime membership wheeze, sorry, traveller loyalty plan, after it lost €1.6m in just eight months. Boss Michael O’Leary expressed his annoyance at the public response to the scheme, saying that far too many “greedy punters” had availed of the company’s generous perks. “Instead of our usual cost-cutting… Read more »

December 11, 2025 Craic & Codology

In a shock announcement, Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelenskyy says he now realises there is “absolutely no hope whatsoever” of a peaceful solution to the bitter conflict that continues to worry the world. The president says the realisation hit home during discussions with Taoiseach Micheál Martin during the Ukrainian’s recent visit to Ireland. Addressing reporters on… Read more »

December 11, 2025 Craic & Codology

by Hans Wringing MINISTER FOR Foreign Affairs Helen McEntee has insisted that there are no plans to drop the Occupied Territories Bill, which aims to ban trade with illegal Israeli settlements. Said Ms McEntee: “This complex legislation is not straightforward, so it’s important we get it right – unlike those wishy-washy Sinn Féin TDs tying… Read more »

December 11, 2025 Craic & Codology

Jack and the Surplus A charmless Fianna Fáiler decides to bet the family farm on a handful of tech companies propping up the economy for the foreseeable future – or at least until the next election cycle. However, tragedy strikes when Jack discovers his golden goose is nearly cooked. Simon Crusoe When his faithful Man… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

Controversial businessman Denis O’Brien is facing a hefty legal bill after issuing a press release in which no one was defamed. The press release became hugely contentious after it was widely noticed that it didn’t contain any serious and entirely baseless accusations. A solicitors’ firm has said the award of substantial damages reflected the gravity… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

In recent months, we may have given the impression that we were critical of Ireland boss ‘Helpless’ Heimir Hallgrímsson. Headlines such as “You’re Hopeless, Heimir” and “Isn’t Hopeless Heimir Hopeless?” may have inadvertently suggested that the manager was in some way unfit for the role. Following wins over Portugal and Hungary, however, we now realise… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

Climate change: Most people find Fionnán Sheahan’s presenting style absolutely chilling Fossil fuels: Jim O’Callaghan still dithering about turfing out Micheál Martin Renewable energy: Simon Harris determined to keep his hands on the levers of power Agriculture: Ivan Yates needs to be put out to grass as soon as possible Food security: Paschal Donohoe delighted… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

Micheál Martin Said to be in good spirits following a series of humiliating challenges to his leadership and living with the constant fear of being thrown to the wolves. However, Fianna Fáil is far from a happy camp these days and most are hoping he hits the road soon. James Browne Regarded as one of… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

IRELAND’S GEN Z graduates have lashed out at telecoms businessman Denis O’Brien, criticising his work ethic and sense of “entitlement”, particularly regarding remote working. Said software engineer Mike Madeup: “Pampered moguls like O’Brien expect to dictate the work practices of employees by forcing them to commute to his expensive offices every day.” Mr O’Brien immediately… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

Embattled media coach Ivan Yates says Fine Gael leader Simon Harris should have “given me a bell” before delivering his recent controversial views on immigration in Ireland. “I could have saved poor Simon a lot of grief from the loony left, fake news media, with just a half dozen sessions at a very reasonable weekend… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

A Tap On The Shoulder, by DJ Carey Kilkenny’s most famous sports personality on how to survive and thrive on a small budget. Smear of the Unknown, by Ivan Yates The politician-turned-media guru shares his unrivalled knowledge on how to harness the darker side of your imagination as a stepping stone to the top. How… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

Pope Leo XIV was coming under increasing pressure from every home in Ireland last night to fast-track the canonisation of footballer Troy Parrott. The calls come as the nation continues to pay homage to the revered striker, following his miraculous intervention in Budapest. “What he did defied mere mortality”, said an emotional hairdresser in south… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

Security guarantees: Relevant kompromat on Trump to remain under lock and key indefinitely Militarisation: Donald happy to keep sending troops to US cities Sovereignty: Trump will double down on efforts to become a king Disputed territory: Both sides agree not to mention Epstein island Armaments: Ceasefire will blow up when it comes into contact with… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

by Anton Dec IRISH TABLOID editors are already hooked on jungle bombshell Vogue Williams and her sensational antics in the I’m A Celebrity camp. The model and media personality is in the Australian rainforest, alongside several other self-regarding celebs who, to this day, remain unknown to the majority of the public. Vogue has been married… Read more »

November 27, 2025 Craic & Codology

I’d like to take this opportunity to welcome Patrick to the USA, from the great country of Ireland, where of course the most celebrated attraction is the wonderful Doonbeg golf course. Given the state of the failing Irish government, it’s no wonder Rascal wants to get the hell away from Meehole Martini and those jackasses… Read more »