SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 28 June 2018
TAX HAVEN PASCHAL DONOHOE Brass plaque operations Brass neck in operation Practises double Irish Practises double Dutch Light-touch regulation Soft-touch regulation Low headline rate Plenty of negative headlines No physical presence No presence whatsoever Use trusts Misused trust Flexible with corporate law Flexible with corporation tax
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 14 June 2018
TRINITY COLLEGE TREE LEO VARADKAR Wooden Wooden Deep roots in Trinity College Shallow roots in Fine Gael Planted 170 years ago Plants self-serving stories in the media Toppled by disease Toppled Enda Kenny Covered in bark Barks at Independent Alliance Lots of leaves during the summer Lots of leave during summer recess Exudes sap Exudes… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 31 May 2018
Kilauea Volcano Stephen Rae Destroys everything in its path Worked for INM Responsible for toxic emissions Responsible for Irish Independent Spewed out of the ground Spewed out garda propaganda Eventually turns to rock Eventually things turned rocky Part of earth’s core Part of Denis O’Brien’s core Making its way to the sea See ya later… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 17 May 2018
Ayatollah Khamenei Tony O’Brien Supreme leader Supreme stonewaller Unelected theocrat Unelected bureaucrat Believes he is infallible Believes he is infallible Lives in Iran Lives on another planet Wears turban Wore out his welcome Hates United States Hates Dáil committees Went to war with Iraq Went to war with PAC Denis O’Brien jet
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Spot the Difference
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 19 April 2018
CONOR McGREGOR RORY McILROY Major embarrassment Masters embarrassment Lost to Mayweather Lost fairweather fans Pulled a stroke Takes too many strokes Pulled a stroke Stuck in bunker Threw trash cans Threw away victory Has no UFC belts Has no green jacket Hybrid sports star Hybrid nationality Worth millions Disappointed millions
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Spot the Difference
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 8 March 2018
Xi Jinping Michael D Higgins Abolished one-child policy Abolished one-term policy Expert on Great Wall Expert on stonewalling Likes pandas Likes causing pandemonium Has cracked down on dissidents Has cracked down on awkward questions Friends with Kim Jong-un Friends with Alan Kelly Writes questionable death warrants Writes questionable poetry Refuses to free Tibet Freely… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 21 February 2018
Jacob Zuma Benjamin Netanyahu Hard grafter Hard grafter Grabbed power Grabs land Fought against apartheid Implemented apartheid Has fathered 20 known children Has fathered a decade of bitterness Accused of corruption Accused of war crimes Blames sun for drought Blames son for unpopularity Friends with witchdoctors Friends with Trump Clung to power for too long… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 25 January 2018
Oprah Winfrey Miriam O’Callaghan Net worth: $3bn Self-worth: Priceless Produces Dr Phil programme Produces filler programming Pioneered self-help ideas Pioneered self-serving ideas Army of loyal followers Army of fawning journalists Media mogul Media manipulator Responsible for The Color Purple Responsible for red faces in Fianna Fáil May run for president May regret running for… Read more »
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Spot the Difference
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 30 November 2017
PRESIDENT MUGABE PRESIDENT HIGGINS Pain in the arse Staying in the Áras Many adversaries Many bad verses A despot of the world Spotted all over the world He once loved socialism He now loves socialising Wanted to extend power to Grace May want to grace us with extended power
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 2 November 2017
RAGNAR LOFTBROK MARTIN O’NEILL Bludgeoned opponents to death Bludgeons opponents to death Raided England’s coast Raided England’s lower divisions Desecrated monasteries Desecrated Aviva Stadium Interested in agriculture Interested in agricultural tactics Thrown into a pit of venomous snakes Works for the FAI Travelled as far as Russia May not get to Russia Scourge of Northumbria… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE – Irma & Leo
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 20 September 2017
HURRICANE IRMA LEO VARADKAR Devastated poor communities Devastates poor communities Releases tonnes of energy Releases tonnes of press releases Won’t leave Florida Won’t leave social media Made thousands homeless Keeps thousands homeless Poisoned water supply Poisoned political debate Controls news agenda Wants to control news agenda Full of hot air Full of hot air Leaves… Read more »
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Spot the Difference – Kim & Marty
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 20 September 2017
KIM JONG-UN MARTIN O’NEILL Can’t hit target with missile strikes Strikers can’t hit target Clamps down on media Clamps down on Tony O’Donoghue Has military launch missiles Has goalkeepers launch missiles Citizens living in poverty Poverty of creative ideas Ballistic missiles Roy Keane Will possibly blow up world Has definitely blown World Cup chances
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Craic & Codology, Spot the Difference, 7 September 2017
DONALD J. TRUMP KIM JONG-UN Hair-brained megalomaniac Hair-brained megalomaniac Hates non-Americans Hates everybody Doesn’t believe in a free lunch Always believes in a free launch Enjoys golfing and flexing his muscles Enjoys nuking and flexing his missiles About to destroy career as president About to destroy Korea
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 25 August 2017
RONALDO DIARMUID CONNOLLY Doesn’t play during the summer Doesn’t play during the summer Courts publicity Publicly in court Troubles with taxman Troubles with linesman Has a hot girlfriend Has a hot temper Loves Monte Carlo Hates County Carlow Punches above his weight Throws his weight around Toppled Barcelona Toppled Ciaran Brannigan Wears heart on his… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 31 May 2017
ROGER MOORE/BOND LEO VARADKAR Suave British Spy Suave West Brit Fights megalomaniacs Is a megalomaniac Drives Aston Martin insanely Drives Micheál Martin insane Drinks dry martini Is a dry sleeveeny Despises Dr No Despises doctors and nurses Puts his health at risk Puts health service at risk Engages in shock and awe Is shocking and… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 17 May 2017
JEAN CLAUDE VAN DAMME JEAN CLAUDE JUNCKER Played a robotic tough guy Is a robotic tough guy Is a notorious middleweight Is a notorious lightweight Is world famous for splits Is world famous for splits Speaks English as a second language Doesn’t want to speak the English language Enjoys alcohol sensibly Enjoys alcohol Known as… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 19 April 2017
MICHAEL O’LEARY DANNY HEALY-RAE Head in the clouds Head in the clods Doesn’t believe in climate change boll**ks Doesn’t believe in change of any sort Global warming does not exist “And if it does, it’s jusht another of them Dublin conspiracies” “It’s all a f***ing load of hot air” “Shure, with the help of… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 5 April 2017
KOEMAN O’NEILL Claims O’Neill went against medical advice Would like to offer Koeman a few words of advice Hamstrung by internationals Players do hamstrings Has no midfield cover Has Glenn Whelan Won’t return O’Neill’s calls Keeps calling up Koeman’s players James McCarthy never plays for him Never able to play James McCarthy Wants FAI to… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 9 March 2017
SIMON COVENEY LEO VARADKAR Highly ambitious grey man in suit Highly ambitious gay man in suit Tediously smug and smarmy Tediously smug and flashy Keen on shameless self-promotion Keen on shameless self-promotion Never shoots from the hip Always shoots from the lip Resents anyone invading his privacy Resents anyone invading his publicity On course for… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 23 February 2017
KIM JONG-NAM ENDA KENNY Furtive high-flying lifestyle Furtive high-flying lifestyle Completely mad Completely power mad Used to poisonous atmosphere around him Used to poisonous atmosphere around him Despised by most of his own family Despised by all in the Fine Gael family Victim of vicious assassination Victim of political assassination Leaving Kimmy a dead man… Read more »
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Spot The Difference
Spot the Difference, 9 February 2017
DERMOT DESMOND SEAN DUNNE Enormously rich tycoon Bankrupt enormously rich tycoon Made an absolute fortune Owes an absolute fortune Friends in high places Friends in low places Silly “Kaiser” nickname Silly “Ballsbridge Baron” nickname Stylish silver-grey moustache Stylish blonde wife Swanky Shrewsbury Road house purchase Murky Shrewsbury Road house sale Lots of smokey cigars Lots… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 12 January 2017
HILLARY CLINTON ARLENE FOSTER Can’t stand the heat in the kitchen Can’t stand the heat in the kitchen Has recurring problems with troublesome emails Has recurring problems with troublesome males Always keen on running for high office Always keen on running for cover I’ve put up with enduring systematic abuse for years Yes, my party… Read more »
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Spot The Difference
Spot the Difference, 1 December 2016
FIDEL CASTRO MICHAEL D HIGGINS Gave lengthy speeches that bored everyone Gives long-winded talks that put people to sleep Endless rhetoric Endless poetry Believed he was superior to right Believes he’s always right Took heat from America Takes first class trips to America Won’t listen to anyone else Won’t listen to government
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 1 December 2016
HILLARY CLINTON NÓIRÍN O’SULLIVAN Fond of running for high office Fond of running for cover Followed in husband’s footsteps Husband following in footsteps Known widely for being generally secretive and crooked Known widely for being Ireland’s Garda Commissioner Constantly tried to hide Bill’s indiscretions Constantly tries to hide everything Denied smear campaign against Monica Lewinsky… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 3 November 2016
POPE FRANCIS ENDA KENNY Job for life Job for life… apparently Prays for our salvation Preys on our taxation Canonises Antagonises Preaches the creed Preaches to Michael Creed Visits Castel Gandolfo Visits Castlebar Says Christ will come again Christ, here he comes again! God’s helper God help us DID YOU REMEMBER TO SET YOUR CLOCK… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 3 November 2016
SIR BOB GELDOF DONALD TRUMP Reputation for being a fanatical self-publicist Reputation for being a fanatical self-publicist Very fond of shooting from the lip Very fond of shooting Likes to talk Likes to talk dirty Has recorded an astonishing number of awful songs Has recorded an astonishing high percentage of the vote Ridiculous Ridiculous hair
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 20 October 2016
THERESA MAY DONALD TRUMP On target to exit Europe On target to exit reality Slightly to the right on immigrant policy Slightly to the right of Genghis Khan Plans to put her opponents in their place Plans to put his opponent in jail Has always focused on serious political issues Has serious issues Making Britain… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 5 October 2016
HILARY CLINTON DONALD TRUMP Rich, white and completely power-crazed Rich, white and completely crazed Blonde ambition hounded by media Blond ambition hounded by media Always has a lot on her mind Always has a lot on his head Endorsed by former US Presidents Endorsed by President Putin In robust physical and mental health Robustly mental… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 21 September 2016
DAVID CAMERON ENDA KENNY • Smarmy right-winger • Party just couldn’t wait to get rid of him • Reputation for fouling up and then retiring • Made a complete mess of Brexit • “I only needed two terms” • Smarmy right-winger • Party just couldn’t get rid of him • Reputation for fouling up and being… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 15 July 2016
MIRIAM O’CALLAGHAN CLAIRE BYRNE Totally convinced that she is RTÉ’s top presenter Totally convinced that she is RTÉ’s top presenter Enormously high salary to prove it Enormously high salary to prove it Loves to give politicians a good interrogating Loves to give politicians a good interrogating Millions of children Catching up fast Statuesque blonde ambition… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 1 June 2016
LOUIS VAN GAAL JOSE MOURINHO Slurs meaningless words in a strange accent Reputation for being moody and losing with Man Utd Grossly over-rated and over-paid Believes in his weird hair style and annoying players Known affectionately as “The Sacked One” Slurs meaningless words in a strange accent Reputation for being moody and losing with Chelsea… Read more »
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Spot the difference
Spot the Difference, 18 May 2016
JACK O’CONNOR SHANE ROSS Believes earth is round Thinks Luas strike is justified Hopes to maintain union ties Likes to drive a hard bargain Advocates power for the masses Stands for no nonsense from the bosses Up to a point Thinks Luas is a robust Spanish red Hopes union dies Likes to drive… Read more »
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 7 April 2016
MICHAEL HEALY-RAE LEO VARADKAR Shameless self-publicist Cute political opportunist Cap firmly placed in Ring of Kerry Speaks in tongues Shameless self-publicist Cute political opportunist Hat in ring to replace Enda Speaks with forked tongue
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 17 December 2015
PETER ROBINSON ARLENE FOSTER Old face of DUP reactionary loyalism New face of DUP reactionary loyalism Despises Shinners Finds Sinn Féin despicable Really loathes UUP bastards Hates Ulster Unionists even more Diehard dull Unionist time-server Dull time-serving diehard Unionist Has colourful wife Has colourless husband
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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
Spot the Difference, 20 November 2015
OLD ANGELUS NEW ANGELUS Vague images of wishy-washy sunsets Wishy-washy images of hazy sunsets Chimes indicating that the news is on Chimes indicating that the news is on Catholic Mammy baking bread Young couple eating sushi and baklava More popular than Ray D’Arcy More popular than Ray D’Arcy Film of fishing boat off Irish coast… Read more »
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